November 26, 2016

A Life Well Lived ♥ ...

Hello everyone!
Hope you all had a nice Thanksgiving.

Ours was good.
We stayed in town for the first time in years.  Hubby and I have been married for twenty five years and every year we've traveled for Thanksgiving.  Our rule was we traveled for Thanksgiving and stayed home for Christmas. For most of our married years we've lived closer to my family so traveling meant going to hubby's parents house for Thanksgiving.  But since moving to New Mexico two years ago, we now lived closer to hubby's family so these last two years we'd traveled to Texas to my family's house for Thanksgiving. But sadly my Dad passed away two months ago so the holidays were a bit different for us this year.

My mom and my sisters decided to celebrate Thanksgiving early this year.  Instead of celebrating it on Thursday we celebrated the Saturday before.  It was an early Thanksgiving - slash - birthday party.  My dad would have turned 70 on November 21st.  He missed his seventieth birthday by seven weeks.  We were all hoping he would make it.  We had plans to celebrate big.  We all knew his time was short and we wanted to throw him a big party surrounded by all of his family to celebrate his life.  Sadly the cancer was too aggressive and took him much faster than anyone expected.  

So in his honor, and with him watching from heaven, we still celebrated his seventieth birthday.  We invited all of my dad's extended family and had several people attend both from in town and out of town.
We set up a memory table with a few of our favorite photos of him.

We served a Thanksgiving meal.
Me and my mom spent most of the day in the kitchen cooking and preparing.
We made A Lot of food and washed A Lot of dishes.
My feet were killing me by the end of the day.
We hold most of our get togethers at my moms restaurant.  It's handy when you need a lot of open space to host a lot of people. And it's nice working in a big kitchen too.

We also drove out to the cemetery where we sang a couple of songs and released seventy balloons.  It was an emotional week for me leading up to his birthday.  The tears flowed in the car while driving up to Texas.  The closer I got to town the more I cried.  It was my first trip back since his funeral. The shock and the numbness is lifting and I feel more now than I did at first.  The mind fog is clearing too and I am able to function better on a daily basis.  I'm still waiting though to be able to talk about my Dad without crying.  I think about him all the time and I'm fine but when I talk out loud I always get a lump in my throat.

Does it ever get better?



  1. I am not sure it does get any better you just learn to live with your loss. Sounds like a wonderful celebration of your dear Dads life and a great tribute from all of your family.

  2. Great time spent !
    Have a nice weekend !

  3. Definitely takes time and will get easier but, of course, the emotions will always be there, just different. Looks like it was a wonderful gathering to remember your dad. Great to have the restaurant to host everyone. Best wishes, Tammy

  4. I thought the early grieving (the first year) after my dad died was sweetly spiritual. The grief washed over me and it felt so foreign to me. I was grateful for the healing and the pondering that went on. God be with you as you think of your daddy and his impact on your life. What a gorgeous celebration you had. He smiled in heaven, I'm sure.

  5. That's a nice way to get together for emotional bonding with the family but again the loss always stays. I lost my father at 65 due to sudden cardiac arrest and he did not have any complications and was the fittest person at home. It came as a shock and helplessness of being of no use or help for him at that time. It took me four years to accept and live with that and even today the situation is not much better. I try to convince my heart in different ways by doing something and letting go of some thoughts by telling myself that I have got a family to look after and can't just live in sorrow all the time. I need to socialise with people and bring a smile on my face like a normal person. That is life, it has to continue. We need to turn our parents love into energy and courage because definitely they don't want to see us sit and cry.

  6. What a lovely celebration for your dear Father! I love that your whole family gathered together with photos and good food to honor his birthday. The red balloons were extra special, too. As you know, I lost both of my parents within a year of each other (5 and 4 years ago) and that is one reason I started my blog - to help ease the pain and loneliness I felt. It does get better, but it does take time. I kept finding feathers and coins and would actually see people that looked exactly like them when I was out and about! I took it as a sign that they were always watching over me and always with me when I needed them. I still think of them every single day, but now it is with happiness - remembering the good things and honoring the things they taught me. It will take a few months for that pain in your heart to ease and I can't say it will ever completely go away, but it does get better, I promise. Be good to yourself. Sending hugs xo Karen

  7. Glad you could get to be together. I don't know if it gets easier, but I do think that you learn to live with a new normal. Not sure that is easier, just different and yes, you do come to terms with different. It takes time, but it will come when it is the right time for it to come. Hugs in the meantime. xx


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